Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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