just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
The beers last night were like the tears from god
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
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