Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Cover your peen. We're going out.
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