We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
How's work?
Spinning.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
