Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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