It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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