Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
