I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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