Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize