Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
The air was thick with penises
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
Randomize
