great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Randomize
