It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
