you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Randomize
