people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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