New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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