This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
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