yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
