omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize