I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
