No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize