Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
You need a sexual gate keeper
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
