yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Holy shit dude........stairs
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Randomize
