party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
