I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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