This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
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