Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Randomize
