i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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