Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
