About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
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he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
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I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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