you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Randomize
