I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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