the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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