i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
