I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Randomize