can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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