he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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