I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
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