Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
