She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Operation Purity has been aborted
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
