Need sex. Gaining weight.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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