quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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