he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
You dont lie about slip and slides
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
