Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
