This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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