I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
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