there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I love you. Go after that dick
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
