Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
