Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
I faked an abortion last night.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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