Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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