YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
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