I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
